A coworker recently had a friend who lost her home, all of her belongings, and the family pets in a fire. The family was at home when a gas pipe blew, and they were lucky to have made it out alive. I can’t imagine what that must be like. My coworker has a really big heart and first posted a message on Facebook asking if anyone had extra clothing that they could donate, the family would be very appreciative. She then sent out an email to everyone at our office explaining the situation and asking the same of our fellow coworkers. The outpouring of support was amazing.
Almost immediately, one person stepped forward and suggested a bake sale to help raise money for the family. I thought it was a fantastic idea. So did most of the people in the office that like to bake. That is, except for one.
This second coworker came to me and said that she was a little irritated that she had received the company email asking for help for this family. She explained to me that she has no problem when it comes to helping animals because they can’t help themselves, but people can and she resented feeling “guilted” into helping. Continuing on, she explained that if it were her friends that had lost everything, she wouldn’t expect her coworkers to offer assistance to people they didn’t know, and she wouldn’t feel comfortable asking them to help. She then went into a long explanation of how she felt that if the family owned the home then the insurance company would cover everything lost in the fire, down to their toothbrushes, so they didn’t really need all of this help anyway. And if they were renters, then they should have had renters’ insurance. She ended her speech by saying, “It’s not that I’m not a giving person…”
I couldn’t believe what I was hearing. There was absolutely no compassion whatsoever from her in regards to this family’s loss.
For the next couple of days while the details of the bake sale were being hashed out and people were signing up for which baked goods they would donate, any time someone asked what she was going to contribute, she would explain that she didn’t mind sharing her food but she didn’t believe in selling it. I’m not sure why she didn’t share the same story with everyone that she did with me. Maybe she knew it didn’t sound right and didn’t want to be shunned because of her convictions. But, until the last day, she held fast to the idea that she wasn’t baking a single thing for that bake sale.
The day of the sale, however, she did bring in a couple of dishes. When asked about it, she said that she hadn’t originally signed up because she didn’t want to feel pressured into baking. On her way home the night before, the baking bug had hit her, so she decided to go ahead and make a few things since there was no pressure to have to if she didn’t want to.
It all worked out well in the end, though, so why rehash this story?
We have become a nation of me, gimme, more, mine, mine, mine. If it doesn’t take care of my needs, get me ahead, make me happy, or make me feel good, then it doesn’t matter to me. The level of greed and self servitude is growing at an alarming rate, and not just at the top of the corporate ladder. In this case, my coworker was just an average office worker who didn’t want to help a family that had just lost everything they had except the clothes on their backs. Why should she bother? After all, the insurance company should take care of them, not her or you or me. That family should take care of themselves. After a fire, with no place to live, they should be able to just get right back on their feet.
Wonder where they were supposed to live while they were waiting for that insurance check to clear? Where were they supposed to wash that one set of clothes, and what were they supposed to wear while that set was washing? It’s winter time. Did they grab their coats while they were fleeing the house that literally exploded into flames? There were four kids. Wonder how they were going to feed the kids? Did they have money set aside in a checking account? Did their checks burn up? What about credit cards or debit cards — did those make it out of the fire? If not, how would they pull any money that they might have out of the bank? How long could they survive on what they had until they got paid again, adding in the extra, unplanned expense of alternative housing?
How long could any of us do any of those things without help?
It’s not as though that family chose to have their house burn. They weren’t asking for a handout because they didn’t feel like getting out and doing something to better their situation. They weren’t loafing and living on the leg of the American taxpayer. They lost their home, their pets, and nearly their lives.
So why the resistance to help? I can’t pretend to understand it. This coworker tirelessly gives her time and money to animal rescue efforts, just not for people.
We can accomplish so many things when we all work together. Shall we all join hands and sing a campfire song now? Seriously, though, I think this sums it up nicely:
“I expect to pass through life but once. If therefore, there be any kindness I can show, or any good thing I can do to any fellow being, let me do it now, and not defer or neglect it, as I shall not pass this way again.”
I hold out hope that humanity is not losing its humanity.
Electric Platypus 